Friday, July 22, 2016
Wednesday, July 20, 2016
Old Jewish man is walking down the street one afternoon when he sees a
woman with perfect breasts.
He says to her, "Hey miss, would you let me BITE your breasts for $100?
"Are you nuts?!" she replies, and keeps walking away.
He turns around, runs around the block and gets to the corner before she
"Would you let me bite your breasts for $1,000?" he asks again.
"Listen you; I'm not that kind of woman! Got it?"
So the little old Jewish man runs around the next block and faces her again.
"Would you let me bite your breasts - just once - for $10,000?!"
She thinks about it for a while and says, "Hmmmmm, $10,000... Ok, just
once, but not here. Let's go to that dark alley over there."
So they go into the alley, where she takes off her blouse to reveal the most
perfect breasts in the world. As soon as he sees them, he grabs them and
starts caressing them, fondling them slowly, kissing them, licking them,
burying his face in them - but not biting them.
The woman finally gets annoyed and asks, 'Well? Are you gonna bite them
"Nah," says the little old Jewish man... "Costs too much!"
Saturday, July 16, 2016
Sunday, July 3, 2016
One afternoon a lawyer was riding in his limousine when he saw two men along the road-side eating grass.
Disturbed, he ordered his driver to stop and got out to investigate.
He asked one man, "Why are you eating grass?"
"We don't have any money for food," the poor man replied.
"We have to eat grass."
"Well, then, you can come with me to my house and I'll feed you,
" the lawyer said.
"But sir, I have a wife and two children with me. They are over there, under that tree."
"Bring them along," the lawyer replied.
Turning to the other poor man he stated, "You may come with us, also."
The second man, in a pitiful voice, then said, "But sir, I also have a wife and SIX children with me!"
"Bring them all as well," the lawyer answered.
They all entered the car, which was no easy task, even for a car as large as the limousine was.
Once under way, one of the poor fellows turned to the lawyer and said, "Sir, you are too kind."
"Thank you for taking all of us with you.
The lawyer replied, "Glad to do it.
You'll really love my place.
The grass is almost a foot high."
Come on now...you really didn't think there was such a thing as a
heart-warming lawyer story...did you????